Given its the holiday season, it is my duty to say something negative and put a damper on it. Yay!
So, this friend of mine has some acquaintances in the 'theater world', and he called me to the 'premiere' of this movie in a theater west of Lincoln Park. The theater turned out to be a 800 sq ft dump of a place near a McDonalds, and the movie turned out to be so bad that one is tempted to suppress free speech and mercilessly destroy such putrescence so that folks are saved from accidental brain damage.
It was initially just awful enough to make me erupt into muffled sniggers, but later it became so awful that as mentioned earlier I wished I was in a totalitarian regime where things such as this would have lead to some missing people and a movie that never happened.
What was the story? It is about this guy who is a psychiatrist during the day, but has this vague desire to clean out public toilets at night. He dresses as a dude to clean the men's johns and as a woman to clean out the women's jennys(?). In the loo he meets this guy who has a cleanliness obsession, and together they have fantasies about a giant cockroach. What this means in reality is that 60% of the movie is shot in the Metra Toilets a few blocks from where I work, and the cockroach is this dude in a motorcyle helmet with brown straws hanging out.
Not surprisingly, the psychiatrists day jobs involves counseling those who want to change their gender. One scene involves a fat white butt-ugly dude in a blond wig saying - "...ohh I feel so feminine. I want to leave my wife, kids and everything to be who I want to be.". Damn funny no? But no. Everyone is dead serious. Then this psychiatrist gives him advice - "Why not just cross-dress first before changing gender? Maybe you just like womens clothes?" Not sure why this scene had to part of the movie, but then another patient comes in.
Its a middle aged dude who advices his psychiatrist to try out some psychedelic pills that he snagged from a drug trial. What is the drug made of? Uranium. What?? Uranium? I wanted to ask - Uranium-235 or Uranium-238? Apparently popping a pill filled with Uranium gets you high because of all those electrons pelting your mind. No, you don't die due to radiation poisoning as your tissues get annihilated. Also, which doctor takes medication from a patient?
I know I just quoted some random disconnected scenes, because that's exactly what it was. The concept of a screenplay was completely alien to the director (apart from the alien cockroach that is). The movie ended (thank the Lord) with everyone popping Uranium pills and getting high. What was the point? Ingest Uranium? Wear a cockroach helmet? Cross-dress and clean public-transit toilets?
I was miffed I had to pay 15$ to watch this garbage. My initially thought was - expensive but a worthy contribution to promote art in Chicago. My art patron hallucination. Yes, hallucination it was because the directors and actors should be fined for making people watch this complete mockery of what a movie is.
So, this friend of mine has some acquaintances in the 'theater world', and he called me to the 'premiere' of this movie in a theater west of Lincoln Park. The theater turned out to be a 800 sq ft dump of a place near a McDonalds, and the movie turned out to be so bad that one is tempted to suppress free speech and mercilessly destroy such putrescence so that folks are saved from accidental brain damage.
It was initially just awful enough to make me erupt into muffled sniggers, but later it became so awful that as mentioned earlier I wished I was in a totalitarian regime where things such as this would have lead to some missing people and a movie that never happened.
What was the story? It is about this guy who is a psychiatrist during the day, but has this vague desire to clean out public toilets at night. He dresses as a dude to clean the men's johns and as a woman to clean out the women's jennys(?). In the loo he meets this guy who has a cleanliness obsession, and together they have fantasies about a giant cockroach. What this means in reality is that 60% of the movie is shot in the Metra Toilets a few blocks from where I work, and the cockroach is this dude in a motorcyle helmet with brown straws hanging out.
Not surprisingly, the psychiatrists day jobs involves counseling those who want to change their gender. One scene involves a fat white butt-ugly dude in a blond wig saying - "...ohh I feel so feminine. I want to leave my wife, kids and everything to be who I want to be.". Damn funny no? But no. Everyone is dead serious. Then this psychiatrist gives him advice - "Why not just cross-dress first before changing gender? Maybe you just like womens clothes?" Not sure why this scene had to part of the movie, but then another patient comes in.
Its a middle aged dude who advices his psychiatrist to try out some psychedelic pills that he snagged from a drug trial. What is the drug made of? Uranium. What?? Uranium? I wanted to ask - Uranium-235 or Uranium-238? Apparently popping a pill filled with Uranium gets you high because of all those electrons pelting your mind. No, you don't die due to radiation poisoning as your tissues get annihilated. Also, which doctor takes medication from a patient?
I know I just quoted some random disconnected scenes, because that's exactly what it was. The concept of a screenplay was completely alien to the director (apart from the alien cockroach that is). The movie ended (thank the Lord) with everyone popping Uranium pills and getting high. What was the point? Ingest Uranium? Wear a cockroach helmet? Cross-dress and clean public-transit toilets?
I was miffed I had to pay 15$ to watch this garbage. My initially thought was - expensive but a worthy contribution to promote art in Chicago. My art patron hallucination. Yes, hallucination it was because the directors and actors should be fined for making people watch this complete mockery of what a movie is.
No comments:
Post a Comment