The Reverse Sicilian

I have noticed that 99.999% of Bloggers are 'unentagled' i.e single. There is a very specific imagery I would like to associate with the word 'entagled', imagine yourself caught on a branch midway down a huge cliff (say in the Western Himalayas). You had jumped off with an intention to hit the floor, but things just didn't fall into place, and you had to get stuck. There you are dangling, at the mercy of the universe, till you get 'unentagled' again.
In this context, if you are 'unentagled', either you haven't fallen off the cliff yet, or you did take the plunge, you did smack across the valley floor, and your innards are currently finely distributed across it. The question that is begging itself to be asked - are you 'unentangled' because you blog so much?, or do you blog so much because you are unentagled? Now, I shall come to the point of my post. Random timepassing over the past year has made me very 'experienced', and has exposed me to infinite amount of blog related gyan. Thus, I feel obliged to pass all my gyan down to my dear readers. So, in 'Blog Gyan Ek Shunya Ek', I shall present my brilliant expose 'Gender based studies of personal web logs maintained on publicly accesible media'.
Male blogs have been observed to be of 3 types, primarily.

• Impersonal topic i.e. 'gyan guru' - Movies, sports, technology, current affairs...
• Witty i.e. 'PJ for AJ' - Inane jokes. Sarcastic or overly complicated humor is lost on most guys. What does it mean in the general scheme of the univerise if AJ only likes PJs. What it means is that however serious a guy looks, it is a matter of time before you discover his jackassy side.

*Digression* I am taking a physics course with a reasonably venerable looking professor with a German accent. For some reason, the discussion veers towards waves, and with childish glee, he starts discussing microwaving CDs and used computer chips. He just goes on and on, the look on his face was simply priceless. Like a child licking on his favorite lollypop.
Anyway, before anybody gets any bright, sparkling ideas, you should read the fine print, and maybe sign your will. Wait a sec, will? Dude, we are grad students! Who the hell would want to inhertit my text book - 'Data Mining - Principles and Practices'!
Anyway, microwaving CDs is reasonably 'safe' (as in you don't burn down the house), if you can take the smell. The Prof had the brilliant idea of putting in 2 CDs into the microwave, with them facing each other at an angle, so that they bounce radation of each other. It is quite similar to shooting yourself in the head with 2 guns.
However, its a insane idea to microwave computer chips, because they reflect microwave radiation instead of absorbing it, causing crazy sparking. If you are unlucky, you just might destroy the local fuse box. If you are very unlucky, maybe you might burn down the university. According, to our prof, it was worth trying, a microwave is just 20$ you see :D. It is rumored that there is a collection of blown microwaves somewhere in the Physics Department. *End Digression*

• 'Light' Philosophy i.e. 'Grande Gyan Guru' - Random reflections on life and the behaviour of people. Quite rarely of a personal nature, and even if it is, almost never overly touchy feely.

Female blogs on the other hand, are almost always more personal. These can vary from angsty confessional type affairs (a.k.a. crybaby), to light hearted ramblings about life (a.k.a toothpaste smile a.k.a colgate pal podi). Even if any of them make an attempt to keep to a topic, the opinion still seems to kind of drive it (mad). It is quite rare to find a female blog that almost entirely stick to the facts ;).
If you want to gender test blogs, the safest failproof test is the 'What I want from man in future' (WIWFMIF) test. It can be easily found by browsing the archives for a couple of minutes. As is obvious from the acronym, it is an elaborate description of what is being looked for in a prospective member of the opposite sex. It is reasonable to assume that this impression has been steadily built up, defined and redefined an infinite number of times since conception. It also reasonable to assume that the term prospective has a surprising permanence. One hypothesizes, is there 'unentaglement' because of un-natural expectations, or do un-natural expectations lead to 'unentaglement'. Was it the chicken or the egg? Or maybe it was donuts. Who knows.
Now, 90% of the content in 100% of these 'What I want' posts can be summed up by the following short yet lucid description, 'tall, handsome with nice-smile, amiable, funny, caring, and (yes, how can I forget!) rich'. However, there is a small problem with this. Lets assume that you are 24 years old. Ok. You have come to know about 200 people in your life. Ok. About 2 will fit that Wal-Mart sized image that has been meticulously built up. Ok?
Firstly, you don't have a chance of hitting that one percent, unless you are around there yourself (see the guy is also equally likely to develop equally unrealistic expectations). Secondly, when demand far exceeds supply, it leaves a lot of room for market manipulation ;). He he. As for me...

All I want is a room somewhere, far away from the cold night air
With one enormous chair;
One flat screen tv;
One big coffee;
Loverly.

Simple demands. Easily met. As I am sure some famous person must have said, 'The key to happiness is not success, but lowered expectations'.

(Those who do know me will realize, there is no intention to offend or hurt anyone! I am not fishing for attention! These are just random statements, and I am as much making fun of myself as I am of others. I know so much about said blogs, because I read them, religiously, almost. )