Double guessing

You know there is no joy to this world like nice juicy speculation concerning another person. Especially, if this speculation JUST holds true under the known facts but has very 'interesting' implications.So, when I decided to come to India for a few weeks at the end of my internship:
People in the US assumed:

• I am coming to see gf lady (yeah, right)
• I am coming to get engaged (no, thank you)
• I am terribly homesick. (not really, but I dont mind going home)

People in India assumed:

• The stuff assumed by the US people. Since, they don't know my status in the US there were some additional assumptions.
  
• I have been kicked out of university. (possible)
• I am unemployed and scrounging in India for a job.(possible)

But, till now I have been looked upon kindly by the University and immigration authorities. I thank allah and assorted gods for that.

I, Je, Ich

I have been having some time. Some time to think. When one has time and not much on mind, one wanders to the self. Most good analysis stems from trying to find the answer to the right questions.But, since you never know what is right you just ask, and ask, and then decide. Or ruminate.
Basic format:
Questioning word followed by I Me Myself followed by event, feeling etc
Questions as such are rarely positive. So some basic categorization for the sake of clarity.

• self-piteous - if you are the soft kind- why am I such a failure
• self-hating - for the tougher types- i am such a loser- more direct and hurtful
• self-indignant-How can this happen to Me? Me Me!

Stuff like self love is also there. But that tends to be more direct and less rhetorical.
You should have got the picture I am trying to paint. Ok. Good. Now.
A couple of questions come up to me reasonably often is:
Why is that I hardly see myself as others see me? To most people (unless I am in a particularly foul state) I come off as smart,successful and reasonably cool. But, to me, no way. I guess I set expectatations up so much that I am destined to failure and frustration. So, in the end I feel disappointed that I didn't get too near my goal, yeah but the damn thing was somewhere in the upper atmosphere so what do you expect.
Why is it that I end up doing things that are intrinsically tough? Not tough. But painful. Like masoshism. Fun no. Do I do it because it's tough, because it's a challenge or because there is something worth it in the end that is better than taking the not so tough and easy to understand clear path. I thing tough taking up interesting challenges adds spice to life. What about challenging people? No ! Bah. Keep them away from me.

Well..

• Intern over. Didn't go too bad.
• A couple of weeks of fun await me.
• Back next semester. Some junta from IIT coming. Good crowd. Good fun. That is the hope.
• Do some work. Get the derrier moving.
• Make life more interesting. If next semester repeats I could be classified as 'vegetable'.
  

Physics, Maths etc.

Yesterday, I visited my friend in Princeton and probably met more smart people over 24 hours than I have in the last 22 years. He is doing very-hard-math-and-physics and has a lot of friends that do very-hard-math-and-physics. I got a nice guided tour of Princeton and the Institute for Advanced Study. If you didn't know, the IAS was expressly created to attract Albert Einstein and other prominent European scientists after the war. I also saw the house where Einstein lived, the place where he worked etc. Interestingly, I had visited his home town of Ulm in Germany last May during mon tour de europe.
So this guy was showing me around the Institute for Advanced Study, when we came across this middle aged man in Khaki shirt and half-pants sitting on one of the sofas. My friend knew the man, so I was introduced to him and we shook hands. Then, the two of them start discussing their work. The discussion was a little animated and the middle aged man excitedly went across the room, tore out a piece of paper and began to play with it to explain a concept to my friend . What really struck me was his childlike enthusiasm for what he did. No ego, no conceit, no contrived aura of grandeur. Nothing out of the ordinary except that the guy was Pierre René Deligne, a fields medal winner. The fields medal is the highest prize in Math, awarded once in 4 years (as opposed to the relatively easier Nobel Prize that is doled out every year). I kind of expected him to be all ego and conceit, that makes one want to go, 'Okay okay, you got a Nobel prize, so what?'. I was so wrong. It brought to mind some of those unfortunate souls that one sometimes runs into in life, you know, with this hugely misplaced sense of superiority. They should probably get in touch with the Fields Medal winner closest to them.
I also met bunch of my friend's friends, totally in awe of their talent and all, but sometimes it's not worth being so smart and talented. I sometimes felt like I would rather be with people who laugh at silly things and speak on mundane topics. I had at one time entertained thoughts of (actually regret about not) being a Physicist but it's bloody scary. I am glad I didn't go down that road. Computational biology is works for me.
To end it: A physicist's understanding of relationships.
This should give you an idea :D.

Cons,scams,frauds and fun things like that

A couple of days back, I was walking back to the 40th street subway station after catching a movie at U Penn (Wedding Crashers if you must know). I happened to walk past a south indian girl X, and for some reason she initiated conversation with me. Obviously, I was a little surprised (and flattered) but hmm... then we are 2 tams in the US of A. Then, she asked me if I could help her find a job. Ohh, so thats why she wants to talk to me. I told her ok, give me a call tomorrow and I will give you a couple of contacts where I intern and you can take it from there. Then she calls me the next day, and asks me if I could come with her for a 'business meeting' in the evening. NOW, I knew something was fishy. Why would some random person on the road want to meet me? Ok, maybe as a convenient contact but meet me? But, then it would be fun to just play along and see what the con was all about. I always was curious as to how these confidence schemes operated. I also wanted to test if I could play it 'cool', you know- play along and don't give the game away. Thats a good skill to have right- how many times have you been around people you need to get along with but don't really like that much. Also, you get this whole 007 feeling. So, I went.
This turned out to be one of those pyramid schemes. I could explain to you what a pyramid scheme is, why it looks good, why it doesn't work and why people think it works when it actually doesn't work. But, I won't. This so called company called BWW was behind the pyramid scheme in my case. Read this link. And this.
You know why it sucks and now to the more interesting part of how they.One of the basic things that is necessary to sell one of those schemes is that people should believe what you are telling them, so basically you need to make them trust you. So, there is this whole elaborate scheme is set up to win over your trust.
1) The 'conference' was at the Radisson. Impressive.
2) The speaker first goes out to make you feel miserable about how you are currently doing in life. 'See you work so much and make so little money!' 'What will you do when you retire' He goes about doing this whole math about you work 10 hours, sleep 8, do other stuff for 2 and watch tv for 4. Instead of watching TV you can easily make tonnes of money. You should be so happy that this opportunity has landed on your lap.
3) 'Raj' and 'Rama' tell of the time when they made platinum and how their life has changed. The whole room resonates to the sound of their jokes and anecdotes. But then of the 160 people in the room, of which apart from the 40 'guests' everyone else is in on the con.
4) There is a break, where X takes me to meet one of the 'senior' members, who tell me about all the money that he made in the scheme. I also meet Y, who stays 2 streets away from me in Besant Nagar. How much luckier can I get in life
5) They do realize that there are likely to be a number of people who are likely to be skeptical about this scheme.(Very rightly so!) So, in order to make those who are not skeptical stay that way, all skeptics are labeled as 'later' people (who don't realize the opportunity they are missing) and non-skeptics (the suckers) are labeled as 'NOW' people (smart people who know how to take their chances in life). It was pretty convincing, if I hadn't known the game from the word go.
So, there is a good chance you would fall for this. Apart from the basic question, dude if this scheme was so good, why isn't everyone in the world super rich, there were a lot of holes in what they said. A reasonably clever person could have figured the whole thing out:
1) They have a 'brochure' that they are very wary to give out to anyone. They won't let you take it home. Or even see it without one of them being in person. Why would that be?
2) The pyramid scheme uses geometric progression, so a guy at level 10 of the pyramid with breadth 4 atleast has 4^10=2^20=1 million people in on it. I ask this guy Y, the successful magnate, which level he is on. He says 10. I ask him how many people he has under him He says 100. Yeah right!
3) I asked him how much he earned. It was a secret apparantly! I 'understood' and we had a nice laugh on it. Little did he know what I was laughing about.
4) This girl goes out and out to win my sympathy and make me feel good about myself. How dumb does she think I am!
But anyway, it was an interesting experience. It gave me an idea of how these con schemes operate. The basic idea is that for other people to believe you 2 things are necessary:
1) They should trust you.
2) You should firmly believe in it.
It is fascinating to see how something which is blatantly non-sensical at a fundamental level can be made to come across as being all rosy and super duper by top notch PR work. This is really interesting right, trust defies logic! When you trust what a person says you don't attempt to analyze what he just said! The very thought of analysis implies distrust! So, why not exploit that to the fullest! That's what this is all about.

Nice Photo

How to make your own reality TV show

The average American watches about 4 hours of TV a day. That's 28 hours a week, about 1500 hours a year, and assuming he lives till 70, he has blown 105,00 hours of life on this activity. So this institution of American life, this quintessentially (sure I botched the spelling) American pastime, has got about 300 million people spending 1/6th of their lives. If you think of it like this, 1/6th of 300 million people, is about 50 million people lives, so if we didn't have TV, we need to have only 250 million people in the US. So what is it that has costed the lives of 50 million people in the US and hundreds of millions across the world. Is there something about it that makes it so alluring? So addictive? I am going to use my extensive experience writing up research surveys to cook up the ideal TV program. Since, the public is the judge of what is good and bad, and reality tv seems to be the most popular form of visual entertainment, I have to conclude that the ideal TV program would be a reality show. So, how do you go about making one of these shows? I have conconcted a formulaic method that is simple to read, easy to understand and easier to implement.

1) 3 girls : Preferably thin with descriptions concurrent to those mentioned in rap videos. Friendly types not preferred.
2) 1 mentally unstable person. This person should have an history of unstable behaviour, problems with drugs, alchohol ,self control, violence.
3) 1 jaded celebrity. Preferably someone well known in the past, but now long forgotten. Usually has serious issues accepting that he is a nobody.
4) 1 politically correct person. Mostly to ensure that the program is loved from the hoods to the hamptons.
5) Lots of cameras, listening devices and alchoholic beverages: The 3rd ingredient creates the action. The first 2 capture it.
6) Claustrophobic conditions: Insufficient space. Everyone loves a good fight. Nothing to spice things up like abrasive, aggressive people in close and constant contact ;).
7) Lots of HDAs, HRTs : Horrifically Dangerous Acts and Horrifically Revolting Things. Keyword: Spiders, Rats, Animal Entails. As for horrifically dangerous acts, just think of things that you could get killed doing.
8) Lots of sin. Any act that has potential to be classified under one of the 7 deadly sins is welcome . Pride, Envy, Gluttony, Lust, Anger, Greed, Sloth. Lust and Anger are usually preferred in that order. It improves the viewing experience.
Add 1),2), 3), 4) followed by differendt parts of 5),6) ,7) and 8) based on personal preferences. It's your own personal experience and this author encourages you to enjoy this dish and takes no responsibility for sanity/intelligence related questions that might be posed to you later.

Some good reads

For once I shall not talk about myself, what I like, what I want to do. I have been doing a lot of random browsing off late and of got into reading a lot of blogs. They are fun, witty and give you a feel for another person's life.
The Compulsive Confessor : This is a blog about a 20something Delhi girl. This is as close as it gets in real life to the reel life of the protagonist of the movie Page 3. As in the movie, she is a tabloid journalist whose primary duty is to cover social events in the city. As, the name suggests it is a look into the life of one of those party every night types. I seem to have a penchant for stereotyping.
Prashanth Sriram : Well, this is the blog of one of my friends Prashanth Sriram. We were in the same school together and then in IIT. Though I didn't really meet him that much in IIT, atleast in the later years. It's philosophical, he usually notices something interesting, and goes hmmm..
The Smug Bug : This is a blog about a 20something Chennai girl. I think she is a tam brahm from a liberal art's colleges (stella maris..). She loves to thulp tam brahm boys (tam brahms are sterotyped as academically brilliant but totally naive and lacking in social skills). She is probably one of those 'cool' types, and invariably straddled between urban and traditional values. That's an interesting conflict. Especially since I am a tam brahm myself.
Serial Killer: On a scarier note, over the last few weeks the US has been shaken by the murders of 3 young children. Well, this maniac had kept a blog where he actually hints at the horror that he is going to unleash on the world. Here is a look into a mind, and it's not pretty.
I just discovered that I like to write. Write I will! I usually don't do things simply because I like it (I look at a lot of other factors..yeah very unromantic), but this is something I will do because I like it!